10 Things You Should Never Say To Your Boyfriend

We all like to pride ourselves on having an honest and truthful relationship with no secrets or lies.

But some things really are just best left in the closet. It’s not lying. It’s not even twisting the truth, technically. It’s just being careful.

Below is a list of ten vital things that you should NEVER say to your boyfriend…. (If you want your relationship to work that is!)

1. “No, you were good. It’s just that….”

Men love believing that no other man can compare to them in the bedroom. If your man does need a bit of guidance in the right direction (possibly quite literally), find a less heart-breaking way of phrasing this. Something along the lines of “You know what’s nice?...” or “You know what might be an idea?....” may be a better way of getting exactly what you want from your man in the bedroom and yet not destroying his ego completely!

10 Things You Should Never Say To Your Boyfriend

2. “I like your mum. But…”

Even if your boyfriend moans about his mum non-stop, don’t. He can. You can’t. Try to work on your relationship with her if possible, but if that’s not an option, just grin and bear it. It may be hard, but at the end of the day, you’re going out with her son, not her, so who really cares? Slagging her off to your man will only ruin your relationship, meaning (obviously) no boyfriend and that she wins, and we don’t want that now do we? Talk to your friends in confidence instead. It’s a high possibility that they know exactly what you mean too!

3. “When we’re married/old/have kids….”

Until you’re both seriously thinking about these things, don’t bring them up, ever. We all dream of being happily married with two kids, a big house and a dog, but bringing these things up too early on in the relationship will only scare your man away, meaning none of the above, anytime soon. Enjoy the relationship for what it is then eventually these subjects will come up naturally, when the time is right.

4. “There’s this great guy at work…..”

There may well be a great guy at work. Or at university, or at your fitness class or that you met at a party on Saturday night. However, in most cases your boyfriend doesn’t need to know this. Don’t not talk about other people and so on, but if you’re going to phrase it in a way that makes your man feel inadequate, refrain. If this guy is that fantastic, surely you want to be with him, not your boyfriend, anyway?

10 Things You Should Never Say To Your Boyfriend

5. “Do you think she’s hot?”

This is always a lose-lose situation. If your boyfriend says yes, you’ll want to kill him. Men will (most often) say no thinking that that is what you want to hear, but then you’ll wonder why he doesn’t think she’s hot (you must have thought she was to ask the question in the first place) and then you’ll question your man’s bad taste in women, leading you to wonder: “Well, if he’s got bad taste, what am I then?” Never a good idea.

6. “You’ve put a bit of weight on since we’ve been together.”

No matter what anyone says, men do care about these things too ladies. Imagine how you’d feel if your boyfriend said this to you. Not impressed, I imagine. If it is true that your man has put on a few pounds since you’ve been together, try suggesting joining the gym or taking up a more active hobby together. This way, you get to spend more time with your man and improve your fitness – A double winner!

7. “Your friends are a bit annoying though, aren’t they?”

The last thing you want to do is to put down his friends. Imagine how you’d feel if he started slagging off your friends. A little bit like slapping him I imagine. It’s a bit like the boyfriend’s evil mother situation. Even if your boyfriend’s friends are a bit geeky/boring/rude/incredibly stupid, just deal with it. Again, try to get on with them, but if that’s just not do-able, at the end of the day, who cares? You’ve got your friends and he’s got his. Your relationship with your boyfriend is totally separate from that that he has with his friends.

8. “I’ll try anything once!”

Unless this is very true girls, don’t say it. You’ll only get his hopes up then let him down. And that’s just cruel isn’t it? It’s like him saying: “Yeah, I love shopping. Let’s go every Saturday!” when we all know that in actual fact, he’s lying and will only take all the fun out of the weekly Saturday daytime shopping trip. Enjoy your sex life and have as much fun, as you both want, whilst respecting each other’s boundaries. If you are actually a little bit kinky though, go for it!

9. “Your mate/dad/brother/hamster is really fit……”

Even if they are, don’t bother. He’ll only get paranoid. Just admire from afar ladies. A bit of eye candy on nights out/at family parties is never going to be a problem really is it? No one needs to know!

And for the biggy……..

10. “Aww… My ex……”

Whether you’re referring to your ex in a good or bad way, this is never the smartest of ideas. Your man will just wonder why you felt the need to bring your ex up and why you’re still thinking about him. If you must, think it in your head. Focus on your current relationship. Not the ghosts of the past. That way, eventually, you won’t even want to bring up your ex. It’ll be all about you and your current other half, and no one else – The way it should be.

Like I said, it’s not lying ladies. It’s just being careful and respecting your man and his feelings. Treat others as you wish to be treated, as they say.

Follow these ten rules, and you’ll soon be well on your way to the blissful, make-other-people-jealous relationship that we all deserve!

Love, Dating and Long Distance Relationships

I hate long distance relationships.

They are almost always doomed from the beginning. The ones that do last are only because the couple makes a deliberate effort to see each other whenever possible and stay in daily communication.

Here is some handy tips / info when having a long distance relationship.

#1. You have to sincerely like / love the person. If you're not sure about them then you're just wasting your time and theirs.

#2. You have to trust them. This means no checking up on them, no being suspicious all the time, just let them be and trust that they are doing the same.

#3. You have to know yourself. Can you wait for love? Are you patient enough? If you're not the patient type then you are just fooling yourself.

#4. Are there any other barriers to the relationship apart from just distance? Watch for dealbreakers but also look to make compromises if you feel the relationship is worth it.

#5. When you are together focus on doing fun activities you both enjoy.

#6. Be virtuous. Don't be selfish, greedy or lazy. Let your lover bring out the best in you.

#7. Set a date time to call on the phone, use Skype, Google Phone or chat online. This is effectively the long distance version of dating.

#8. Write and send letters via snail mail. Send along small gifts and personal momentos.

#9. Don't try to buy the other person's affection by send them outrageously expensive gifts. They won't be impressed. A wooden locket you carved yourself is more meaningful than a gold one.

#10. Eventually you will want to make the trip to visit each other. Let it be a mutual decision.

#11. Offer to stay in a hotel upon visiting.

#12. Don't expect sex if its your very first meeting.

#13. Don't be pushy or overly dramatic. That is creepy. Avoid anything remotely creepy. Stick to being patient with a dose of humour and wit.

#14. Always leave the other person wanting more.

If you rush things in any relationship don't be surprised if it blows up in your face.

In the beginning...

This new blog, titled True Love Bites, will be dedicated towards dispensing relationship advice, often with some of my own past experiences used as examples.

In part this blog is also a sequel to my other blog The Male Brain at Work which focused both on relationships and also on the different / similar roles played by men and women in society and even dipped into topics surrounding sexuality, advertising and male dominated culture.

As a result I will be cutting back on how often I post on my old blog because any time I run into a relationship topic in my writing it will be posted here instead and the old blog will become more dedicated towards studying the social interactions / roles played by the warring / loving sexes.

True Love Bites will be focusing solely on relationships. Nothing else. I might mention sex in passing, but we won't go into great detail about it. It won't be censored out, but it will be left a bit blurry and vague. Got it?

As part of my first tasks for this blog I am going to write a fresh relationship article to get the ball rolling.

:)